worms make the dirt, and the dirt makes the earth….

i was thinking today while i was running how often i stereotype people. when i see a scantly clad girl with platform shoes and huge earrings, she’s a slut. if i see some guy dressed up like weezer he’s an emo head who thinks everyone is stupid . when i see some person who’s dressed goth style, i see a contemptous person who thinks life is pain. all this is automatic response though, but its strange that it should be so automatic. i guess its just ingrained in me or something. cause then i was thinking “well, what do i think of guys who don’t wear shirts while they run?” and then i realized that most of the time, its a musclebound meathead who gets his jollies off of belittling people, and isn’t that intelligent, and i know that’s not me, so why should i judge people otherwise? but that’s the thing, i don’t let that kind of thing interfere with how i interact with people, but i can’t help but think that it does because subconsciously, i’ve already type casted them. but i shoved that aside cause the next question that popped in my head was “what do people think when they look at me?” and normally when i have thought that i start thinking about what i actually do look like, and what i’m doing and everything, but this time i was just blank for a few seconds, and then i just countered myself with the question “who gives a fuck?” and i burst out laughing in the middle of my run, cause i truly didn’t give a fuck, and i got this wierd stare from this family in a house across the street, and i just smiled at them and kept running. i just remembered that right before i left i was telling myself “why the hell do you want to wear a shirt, you’re just gonna soak it in the first 2 minutes of your run, and then you’ll be out one more white shirt you can’t rewear until its washed” and seeing as i only have a few left anyways, and don’t want to do laundry, i just went without really thinking of it. but yeah the automatic response thing is funny, and i think i’ll be able to break out of it eventually…at least that’s my goal….

haha, collin should be home by now, it should be fun to catch up with that fool. i mean, with out me at my house in redmond he’s gonna have to hang with evan or something to get his pop and chips fix. i can just bet that my house in seattle is way too far out to get his ass over here. i’ll just tell scott to bring him over. man, i am loving this whole work weekend thing. no deadlines, no thinking, just beautiful routine during the work day, and coming back and doing whatever the hell i want when i get home. i do need a new book though. i did finish atlas shrugged a couple of days ago though, that was a great book….it was pretty much thinly disguised metaphysics, cause there would be story for a bit and then there would be an obvious tirade of 50 pages where ayn rand just goes off and lectures, but it really was a masterpiece of modern literature. the ideas contained in that book are just amazing….but hard to explain. its kinda against everything that i’ve ever learned but i think that it makes more sense. it talks about each man being and end in himself rather than a means, and that the reason that people today are lost and unhappy are because they think that they are a means. and because they think they are a means, they are forced to depend so much on other people, that they lose a sense of themselves, and since they have no sense of themselves, tehy can’t ever be happy, because its all depends on what other people tell you, as opposed to what you tell yourself. and jeez, that’s only part of it…theres a bunch of philosiphy about government, society, etc. i basically thought that this was a beautiful refute to the grapes of wrath….i couldn’t reccomend this book enough, because all the ideas are solid and very thought provoking, but its a shame cause i know many people won’t read either that book, or the fountainhead because they’re pretty dense reads and both are over a thousand pages….ah well, if you can i say do it.

ahhh, time for dinner, a whole rotisserie chicken, courtesy of those fine people at QFC

the miracle of life……..is AWESOME….