so its mandatory to go out after you finish your finals and just get trashed. i got way too trashed on friday night, and again last night. i think i need to re-evaluate my consumption again, becaus ei was feelin prety crazy with these blood thinners. mostly drunk, but its got an edge to it. i might have to quit with the drinkin’ again, cause i’ve been drinking like i normally would (fifth of something, with miscellanious beers). it was great to cut loose, but shit, i could have hurt myself.

now, i’m fuckign tired though, witht he crazy sleep patterns during finals week, and then going balls out celebrating has taken its toll. i didn’t do shit today, so that was nice. and hell, the next month is going to be a weekend. i stopped wearing my watch, it just doesn’t matter rigth now.

i blew through an RPG in like 4 days here of straight sitting, it was great. best battle/magic system i’ve ever seen in a game, but damn, the story just absolutly blew, no character development, and it only took me 30 hours to beat. so i have mixed feelings about it, but it was a nice distraction, now i gotta get another RPG cause they’re great games to play when you have no responsibilites. mayhaps i’ll go christmas shopping tomorrow and buy myself some shit.maybe i’ll just go cream my shorts or something. maybe i’ll lose my brain for good one of these times. that might be nice.

my knife sits, staring, mocking….

use me…

“but i could cut myself and bleed a whole lot”

i am fun to twirl around

“i love you, and you keep me from biting my fingernails down to their base, but i have to chill on you for a bit”

c’mon chussie, just a few twirls

*puts knife away*

yeah, WHO’S THE MAN NOW?

my fingernails are starting to make a come back now. i am the king of nervous habits, and sitting around has many pitfalls for me. my mind isn’t strong enought o be completley distracted. hmmm, mayb emy mind is so intent on distracting itself that it leaves my body to its own devices. since my body doesn’t have any rational thought, its only device is instinct. i guess my instincts tell me to bite my nails, or chew on something. hahaha, i have an oral fixation i suppose. finals kill my fingernails though.

rollin, rollin, rollin. keep with the runnin, in circles, perpendicular to yourself.

possibly the greatest thing that man has invented is the hot shower. the combination of being bombarded by water tat is at a comfortable temperature, whenever you want it, is just incredible. you having a shitty day? take a hot shower. feelin like you just can’t wash that mcdonalds grease off? take a shower. someone pissign you off? take a shower. good god, its awesome. being able to take a shower whenever i want is one of the greatest freedoms i have. it only takes a minute, or you can sit in there for a half hour. no one bugs you cause you’re naked. taking showers with girls is rad, but that depends on your mood, and the girl too i suppose. shower time is much like time on the crapper. you sit there and you just relax, because whatever problems you have are just left behind at the bathroom door, and you think about whatever teh hell you want.

that’s what’s great about the bathroom. you enter and you go into autopilot. you can sit on the toilet, spend 10 minutes doing a good job shaving, brush your teeth, take a shower, all these things that are things you kind of have to do, since we live in america. but all these things are grooming acts. where you don’t have to think, and its strictly a personal thing. we’re not girls, so bathroom time is alone time. and when you come out, you go back to your life, but you smell better, and just in general feel better.

Ode to a Bathroom

Oh bathroom, how you own me

you are always there when i need to pee

you keep things real, you fill me with glee

you are the most underappreciated room in the home

but you are the hub that everyone will return to, eventually

you can always sit in there by yourself, and ignore the phone

you can read magazines to your heart’s delight

i think most people’s reading would be non-existant without the crapper

step into the shower, you feel like a king, full of vigor and might

step out, and refreshment fills you, and you’re feeling dapper

one of the only rooms that allow for a lock, that can be justified

think of yourself, think of others, think of whateer you want.

it smells, like a mix between excrement and formaldehyde

but its cool because its mostly my fault

you are beautiful and you keep me clean

and i know you’ll be there after a night of beans

*bows*

god writing stuff like that always takes me awhile, that took me like 20 minutes, for that short crappy thing. i think too much about them, probably. but writing stuff with form and structure takes time, time i don’t like to spend, so i put out crappy stuff.

crappy stuff is better than non-existant stuff as far as i’m concerned.

i need a sense of humor back. it’s been so cynical latley, and i mostly just see funny things as cynical humor. it’s good to have that, but without the straight up foolishness sense of humor, you get jaded. and it’s just unecesary. jackassery is in order to cure that. oh wait, not motivated. maybe later. i’ll get around to it, you put things off long enough and then you have to deal with it, kicking and screaming. hahaha, anyone who hasn’t seen it, should. especially people who have experienced college or gotten fed up with it.

wudar, stuff is rad.

keeps me on my toes