so i’ve been meditating so much that i have been neglecting this guy. on the other hand there’s not really much to talk about. stagnancy would be the word for it, looking for jobs and not finding anything, but then again, not trying very hard in the first place. going to work, dealing with stuff there. coming home, dealing with stuff there.

everything and everyone blurs together to this link of events that no matter how extraordinary it seems, comes back down to seeming ordinary yet again. the more that i look around at everyone and everything around me, the more i realize that they share more common qualities than differing ones.

but it doesn’t make one feel hopeless, just powerless. the two are interconnected, but then again, so is everything, i feel, just with differeing levels of detail. embracing the powerlessness (or just acknowleding it, i suppose) leaves you only at the mercy of yourself, which unfortunatly is your cruelest tormentor.

despite all the doom-and-gloom though, i have to say that things are spectacular, and i am beyond content. school is done, and i couldn’t be happier. wading through one pile of bull shit just to dive head first into the next one doesn’t seem that bad anymore. at least it will be a change of pace.