there are always days like today. i write about them somewhat frequently, because i normally end up here when i have them. but today is a mix, a blend, a hybrid of inner hollowness and outward joy that is inexpressible, but makes sense because there is no sense to it. but the senselessness gives it sense. it’s really what gives life some perspective.

as i wrote that paragraph, i took a sidetrack to see what was going on the unchained mind, and i find once again, i have beaten to the punch, but it doesn’t really matter because we’re both just bouncing off each other anyways, two blogs forces combined to make the super blog. at least the one that has ideas harmonious enough to build on each other.

but anyways, the idea was the fact that knowledge comes gradually. i mean, if you wanted to know all the wisdom of the past ages, there are tomes of it over thousands of years to peruse. but there is a big difference between knowing such information and understanding this information. i could read until my eyes bled, but i wouldn’t have the understanding until there are events that plant them in, to make the understanding complete.

so this leaves the question (to me anyways), can you force the understanding? there’s a voice screaming from the depths of my primal soul that immediately screams “NOOO” and i’m prone to listen to that voice. but i can also let it fester and then something is forced to happen, because it was bound to at sometime. so then there’s that balance between forcing it, and letting it be. try and get to the apex of that bell curve and find that harmonious, creamy middle. but it has to be done by playing by ear, because the variables are all unknown, and you gotta go by gut instinct. because you don’t have the necessary wisdom, right? says me, anyways.

i got more thinkin’ to do.