burn that time, but do something productive while you’re at it. i don’t absorb information anymore despite being saturated in it constantly. not quite numbness, not quite incomprehension. i’m going to say that it’s just over-exposure to self-stupidity, or OESS. that sounds clinical, but really is something to be taken quite seriously. OESS can be sinister in its ways of sapping life from those who expose themselves to it. but no matter how hard you try, you can’t escape. since it’s such a vicious cycle, and that there’s not really anything that can be done about it, there’s not much point in trying to do anything . just go with it, and see where it takes you. most times mundane, other times slightly less, but interesting….yeah, that’s the ticket.

Today’s Entry: Crossed Lines

Apparently a very popular name for artists, as it’s the name of an Australian band’s album (Saab 78), an english movie, an irish movie, and a chinese one. this phrase obviously has more meaning overseas, as no american has jumped on this title yet. i mean, crossed lines…doesn’t it just scream innuendo?

13 minutes is such a discreet value. i want to type something out in 13 minutes, which can seem like a long time, or a really short time. i mean, if i sit here and stare and think a bout what i want to write, then that’s probably 2 minutes. that’s a sixth of the time i want to dedicate to this, wasted in some spacing off time, or adjusting my mp3 player because i can’t listen to NPR and blog at the same time.

but lo, i don’t need to really think of anything towrite, i’m just going to go to wikipedia. i realize this whole crusade is rather stupid, but what the hell, this is my corner of the internet.

Today’s entry: Krasnensky

This particular place is a province of russia. what province you might ask? well, it could be a village or a district, depending on how you frame it. i know nothing about this district, or this town, so maybe i’ll write a little story about it. i imagine reflecting on something with no knowledge on what you are reflecting on would be detrimental to any understanding, but i think that’s presumptuous of me. anyways, 4 minutes to go, here’s a story.

A boy walked out of the local market carrying 3 heads of cabbage and a chicken, which was going to be tonight’s dinner. he brought them home and gave them to his mother, who bemed with pride.

“so much responsibility for a 6 year old. and so handsome too! now go read and i’ll tell you when it’s time to wash up for dinner”

he started his journey upstairs to read, but tripped over the bad step that had been on the staircase as long as he’d been alive. he fell backwards down the stairs breaking a few vertebrae, and felt the terrifying sensation of being unable to move or feel his legs.

he then realized that even being a handsome and responsible 6 year-old did not make him invulnerable to the twists of fate, and that it could always swoop in and change his life forever.

the boy had learned a valuable lesson.

the end.

war and peace, this is not.

time keeps on slipping….slipping….slipping……..into the future.

doo doo Doo doo.

I haven’t even thought about this place in awhile, and i think it’s time to start forcing myself to write again. things are hectic, yes, but they always are. i feel my brain is slipping into extreme atrophy, when i can basically catalogue my life by what i was watching on TV or reading at the time.

i.e. : This is the time of my life when i am watching the wire, finishing up arrested development, and reading the journeyer. i have also been playing rockband and deadrising on my Xbox 360. these are the medias i am consuming at the moment, and should provide an accurate cross-section of how rediculous my life is.

work comes in waves, relationships come in waves, i can feel them washing over me and receding. back and forth, back and forth. Each time the tide goes out it erodes just a little more of my brain, sweeping it out into the fathomless expanse of electrons, and other things composed of matter, where it really wants to be. my body isn’t really that efficient. it thinks it’s OK to go around losing all sorts of building blocks and all sorts of good stuff to keep things running smoothly. there’s gotta be a tradeoff i suppose, but i guess i should give it a couple million more years, and see what happens then.

i need to cheat for myself and find some website that gives you something to ponder on a daily basis. get that first sentance down, the door cracked open a little, and then the wall can come tumbling down. get down all those thoughts that will flesh out ideas i already hold, and see what happens. something good is bound to happen from this huge collection of ideas i have. it’s a matter of odds. actually i got a better idea. i’ll just start going to wikipedia, and clicking on their random article, and see what kind of discussion i can get going about whatever it feeds me. if i’m clever and resourceful enough, i should be able to bring the topic back to myself, maybe throw in a few random daily occurances, and viola! instant progressive thought. i should try to do this at least a couple of times a week.

let’s start now!

Wikipedia article: Thomas J. Watson Research Center

Ahh research, how familiar yet unfamiliar i am with thee. This is the major research center for IBM, i can’t even imagine the types of rooms they have in that place, but if it’s like most research labs i know, it’s loaded with all sorts of equipment that was on the cutting edge 4-5 years ago, and is still very functional. this is supplemented by loads of equipment that is over 10-20 years old, and is the majority of the equipment. they do what their supposed to (i mean, how many improvements can you make on adjustable voltage power supply or a centrifuge?) and people do experiments where they change parameters, hoping for that moment of serendipity, which will eventually happen, if you keep at it.

of course this is IBM though, so i’m sure there are machines that are super crazy, and they got all sorts of machines to help set up carbon nanotube constructs and variable semi-conductor reasearch centers that are completely dust free, and you have to dress up like you’re dealing with ebola virus research, or deep sea diving. Are these the places where the future is made? or maybe a front of some kind? i mean, it is located at columbia university, a well know haven for liberals hell bent on ruling the world. at least i think.

is there some sort of irony linked to the fact that i’m typing this on an IBM laptop? Or is the universe trying to tell me that things are so interconnected, with seemingly random circumstances, that aren’t random?

who knows, but i guess i’ll keep an open mind.

finally made it over to this corner of the web. what can i say, warfish eats up alot of online time.

i got this flu moving through my body. it started at my lungs, forcing me to cough all the time. it does this still a little, but nowhere near the crap i was coughing up 3 weeks ago. then it migrated to my sinuses. the stuff that had been climbing out of my lungs was now coming out my nose, and still is, but again, not as bad as a week ago. the past couple of days, my ears have been popping, like the virus is trying to make its way over there. at least there isn’t fluid coming out of my ears. i wonder if this virus has the tenacity to go after my eyeballs? i’d beeter not make it angry, it’s finally starting to be purged from my body, after close to two months. i don’t want to get it all riled up again. this has been the worst flu ever, just for the sheer longevity of it.

besides the physical problems there hasn’t been much else to distract with. the usual medias, the vids, the movies, the reading. keeping up with various election ploitics. i think i finally hit my threshhold on that. after watching clinton come back last night to gasp for air right before drowning, it makes me realize this isn’t going to end until the convention in june, and even then, it might not be over, depending on if it comes down to michigan and florida being tie0breakers despite being stripped of all their delegates and whatnot. we’ll see what happens, but there’s fatigue setting in.

my head feels like a black hole lately. things go in, but there is no way to get them out. all the information i have ever accrued in my life is a jumble. hard to access and with millions of gaps that should be filled to have that complete thought, the whole picture, and not just glimpses of scattered parts that make no sense. my brain doesn’t hurt, it just feels numb and is operating at a diminished capacity. could be a million different things,but i bet being sick is a major component. that black hole feeling is kind of disorienting though, but not crippling.

it’s that time of the year when spring is starting, so the brain starts coming out of hibernation. doing things outside seems more appealing after alot of forcing over the winter season. there will be more sunlight in general. i can’t wait until this weekend. i’ll lose an hour for birthday partying this saturday, but it will also mean that it’ll be light past 6:30, and soon i’ll be going home when it’s light out. i think as i get older, my body needs more light to keep itself going. gotta charge up those solar batteries.

so many things to do, so little time.