words have a certain draw to them. for instance, i try to think of something to write here, right up to the very last minute. like i know i need to come here, but i haven’t planned out a goddamn thing and am trying to think of something right before the buzzer. outwit myself into thinking of something somewhat interesting to write about. but that’s what that draw is. thinking of something random like “clueless” and then thinking for a moment, trying to coax the little idea that may be crouching behind it out into the open. like you feel it drifting away, but it doesn’t do so at a hurried pace, it almost sticks around, daring you to find something meaningful to attribute to it. and then it still mostly ends up slipping away.

so why was i here again? feelin’ the itch i suppose. to express some prose. and be opposed. to girls with clothes.

ok, that was terrible, but it makes me laugh.

there’s no reason i shouldn’t be doing something i love right now.

uhhh, don’t take that the wrong way.

you know, it’s wierd. i sometimes look at the life that i choose to lead, and i can’t but help and feel how ridiculous it is. at another moment though, i can look at it with a sense of wonder and awe that feels ridiculous, but calming at the same time. this life was meant to be lead, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

so there’s no reason i shouldn’t be doing something i love right now.