hi ho

ok listen up, exsistance is no longer based upon rational thought. rational thought has no place in an ecosystem. it has an evolutionary advantage, since we can change the environment to suit our needs. outside of that it is useless.

so at one point, people used to say “i think, therefore i am.”

thinking has been outmoded in the past few centuries or so though, especially in the last few decades. it is counterproductive to have seemingly rational thoughts, because most of the time, they’re only rational because we say so. since the use of thought seems to be decreasing at an exponential rate, “i think, therefore i am” is just a silly way of justifying our existance, when in reality, we can’t justify our existance.

so i put forth a new slogan for our people, one more fitting to the needs of our current situation (i would guess this only applies to nations other than third world countries thoguh, because they actually have real animal problems like hunger and shelter and survival, we only have problems like finding the next greatest gadget, or wondering how we’re going to get to work the next day, or the eternal quest for some soulmate, which is a person exactly like you, but you can have sex with them)

“i whine, therefore i am”

if you have problems, you gotta exsist right? at least that seems like what everone else is leaning towards….guilty as charged (thank you ben, rhymes with men)

i kinda thoguth my last point where i was saying that too much understanding is humor and too little is fear, and i thought that was kinda profound, but i like to pat myself on the back, and i’d like to pat myself on the back for this one too, but really, i’m sure someone else came up with this, becuase if i can come up with something, anyone can. they all got the same equipment as me, right?

this stuff just comes to me while i’m studying.

i’d just like to take this oppertunity to proclaim my geniusocity.

geius (n): a person who has a sense of humor about anythign and everything

anything, anythign but finals, right? ha, i don’t even really have finals in a sense. i have it for ochem, but my bio and my physics are just tests that are worth more. and the bio’s out of the way so its on to the hard stuff. i mean, this happens every quarter, but everytime finals rolls around, you don’t really care anymore. the end is in sight, and you can just taste the freedom that you’re gonna have in less than a week. i mean, by this point, you either know this crap or you don’t.man, i could go on and on rationalizing how i can take it pseudoeasy this week. but in reality, i’m gonna study for like three hours tonight, 10 hours tomrrow, 3 hours the next day, then 10 hours on friday. considering i don’t sacrifice a whole lot of time to mah skoolin’ (much less time than i would dedicate to a full time job) so this makes up for it. it’s not like i’m gonna fail these tests or something anyways.

so yeah, there’s my boring life, now to switch gears and blabber

two nights ago, i almost set the house on fire. it was awesome. i was burning trash carboard in the fireplace all the while unaware that there was a candle on top of the stove part of the fireplace (basiaclly just a thick metal sheet. so after about 10 minutes of throwing cradboard in there, i start to hear this fizzling and popping noise, and behold, there is a half melted candle sittign on top of the fireplace, and a shitload of wax all over the top, and dripping all down the right side of the fireplace. i pull the candle off, but nothing really seems to be damaged so i just keep throwing cardboard in there. after about another five minutes of this, that wax is really popping, but i’ve only got one more box to go, so i’m determined to finish off the burning. and tehn….PHOOMPH….that wax reached its specific heat or something, cause all the wax on top went up all at once, creating a moderate flame, like 3 to 4 feet high.

of course my natural reaction is to point and laugh at the flame, because its funny, but mike runs by me and grabs the stockings off the mantle which are right below the flame, and i realize we probably shouldn’t let other things catch on fire. it wasn’t anything to be too worried about i thought, i mean, not worth risking a nice fleece blanket to smother a fire that’s goign to coat it in wax. so mike and i are looking for alternate way to put the fire out, cause its still making the white brick mantle black. we can’t find a fire exstinguisher, or baking soda, so we think:

“hmmmm, this isn’t one of those situations where water makes things worse is it?”

“nah….”

so we tried a little and it made the flame huge, like twice as high, so things were starting to get out of hand now, so i grabbed teh doggie bed off the floor (i still didn’t want to use a nice blanket and ruin it) and smothered it. so after it was out, i threw more cardboard into it, and it got goign again, but it was much much smaller, so i just let it burn off all the wax cause i didn’t want to clean it off later. man, the house was smoky for about 3 hours after taht, it was pretty dense. fire is pretty awesome, nut i’ll have to make sure that i don’t leave candles on top anymore. and for future reference, water does not put out wax fires.

we also put up a bunch of christmas lights this year (well, like 30 bucks worth or so, which goes a long way at bellingham grocery outlet) and even with our crappy half ass job, we were still by far the most decorated out of all the houses around ours. if you drive around for a bit there are some people who obviously go all out every year, but in our 3 to 4 block radius, people put up like two or three strands. so we have this up for like a week, and then we see one of our neighbors across the street putting up more lights, and adam talked to them for a bit, and they told him that no one around there ever really gets into christams and we were the first to put up lights on this house we’re living in so it inspired them to put up more.

this inspires us to get competative.

i think after finals are done, we’ll probably blow another 30 bucks on lights or something, it would be great if they put on more lights after that and it just escalated into this huge war where we have a santa and a team of reindeer and various other gadgets everywhere in an attempt to outdo our neighbors. then when its all over, we can pack it up and cry ourselves to sleep when we realize how pathetic our lives are.

so biznatches, you think you’re hep to the now?

well try this on for size:

BLOW ME!

ok, that was rude and uncalled for, but most of the things i say on this site are anyways, so i reiterate….BLOW ME!

bah to school, one week left. almost there. almost. eh, who cares. so break rolls around and i gotta deal with other stuff again. i don’t know if i feel up to it. not yet anyways. maybe after cramming for a week i’ll feel better about taking a break. cause right now, i’m just feeling like break is goign to be a black hole of time, and i’ll have to deal with home again…it was wierd, it was the first time i was home and i didn’t even feel a sense of home. i don’t feel it up here, i don’t feel it down there, nowhere is comfortable anymore. just another phase i’m sure though.

pretty soon i’ll be out of college, then what? i’ll be this highly trained cog. able to fit in anywhere in this complex american machine. an interchangable part, that can fill a hole, but be easily replaced by s cog that is in the same shape as me. my brain will be sophisticated enough to fill a void that someone has determined for me.

buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

the incessant noise is just that….noise. noise everywhere, buzzing, moving, going, trying, having, wanting, pushing, shoving, thinking, planning, persuing, hurry hurry hurry…wait…hurry.

entertain me.

help me justify my clandestine activities, whatever they may be, i don’t even know what i keep secret anymore..

make the time go faster, anyway, anyhow, anything, i don’t care, as long as it makes me feel somewhat shocked or amused.

both of the emotions are pretty similar to me anyways.

buzzzzzzzzzzzzz

ok i’m not really that jaded right now, only sorta kinda, if i was really jaded, i would go shoot myself or soemthing, and that’s just plain vanilla flavored dumb. you might as well get stupid, because its better to be stupid than smart.

Picture This:

a chorus line of mice, with top hats and canes, swaggering onto a huge broadway type stage with lots of white round lights flashing in a chasing fashion, with huge dark red, velvety curtain slightly swaying due to the massive amount of mice . singing in a very high, yet still harmonius voice….

“One. singular sensation. every little step she takes” (doo doo doo dooo doo doo)

and as the mice happily sing their broadway melody, we pan down to the orchestra pit where mice in black suits play their tiny instruments, with the graceful ease of the greatest virtuioso to ever touch the instrument. all of them know their place, know their role among the group, and produce the perfect sound for a perfect looking chrous line of mice.

the audience is filled with little mice families, with the little boys dressed in tiny suits with miniscule red bow ties, and the girls in their pretty frilly pink dresses, with lacy white highlights, and pink bows inbetween their ears. lots of mice…with black eyes, all staring up at the stage, filled with hope, filled with aspirations of the micely kind. they may have to go face the world they created for themselves tomrrow, but at this moment, they have created a different world for themselves. it may be an escape for them, but they are mice, and mice need escapes sometiems too. They enjoy their show, and afterwards, continue on to their respective semi-circular holes from whence they came.

ok so that was just ass random, it seemed so pretty though…we all need something pretty…

Listen:
laughter stems from too much understanding.
fear stems from a lack of it.

ugh, trying to kill time, trying to get blogger working…

ok today was fun. everything was just mostly amusing to me in every regard. i was just really relaxed.

but yeah, here’s a couple of things i noticed today that made me laugh.

1. while i was in the library getting some periodicals for this paper i have to write, i pull out the book that’s at eye level and i totally see this hot girl going at her nose, and digging out this huge brown thing. i immediatly started gawking, and she didn’t even notice as i turned around and started laughing.

2. when i was going to get a table to sit down at, i made eye contact with this girl as i was walkign past her to get to the table so i could sit down, and just as i was about to pass her, she tilted just a little too far and fell over. she was next to the wall, and there was a chair in between, so i was pretty much helpless to stop it, but she bounced right back up and was blushing as i asked her if she was ok…in between snickers between me and the guy that was sittign with her…damn other guy sittign across from her, i so would have been in.

3. as i left the library, these two black guys walking along split their side by side walking to let this hot girl walk between them, and as she walked by, one of the guys turns and says “hey, how you been doin’?” in a tone like he had known her since grade school or something. and she had the most confused look on her face as she was trying to figure out what the hell these two guys were doing, adn then they just turned around and started busting up laughing, like they had just proved some point or soemthing.

4. from one side of red square to the other, i heard 5 people hocking up some major loogies. like deep glutteral, pushed out by your adam’s apple kinda loogie. and although 4 of them were guys, one of them was this really nicley dressed freshman, who had obviously spent alot of time gettign ready for her walk up to campus. and she just up and hocked this huge one and just spat it out all non-chalantly. that was one of the coolest thigns i saw i think.

5. while i was sitting in bond hall waiting for my physics class, i saw this person throw their gum at the garbage can. they missed, but got it ont he edge of the garbage bag. eerytime i got bored during that class, i would just look out the door and see how far the gum had gotten by trying to ooze to the ground, it was only a couple of inches by the time i left class, but it was still rad. i was cheering it on all through class.

6. while walking back to the cars parks, starts to walk by me and mikey (which he pretty much does every day) and mike just leans over and says “have fun with your logic homework” and that was rad, because invariably, everytime he walks by us, he’s going to work on his logic homework, and we’re always going home.

7. and right now, i’m listenign to charlie brown christmas…greatest christmas music ever, and we got soem lights up, but we’re gonna go to town tomrrow, and show up all the families in this neighborhood.

man, i probably had 8 more things i noticed today and said i was gonna publish, but now i can’t really remember any of it now. ah well, i think i hit the highlights. god watching that girl fall was hilarious…

bahahaha, ok so i post that stuff there and i go to check ben’s blogger, and he’s already got it covered like a jimmy hat

Initial WAnk says:

meh, why find out the truth when you can start wild rumors based on nothing

crapmaster R says:

that is one of the greatest points you have ever made

so there’s the real version

what can i say, i feel out of place everywhere i go.

so yeah, thanksgiving is rad though, you eat alot and you hang around alot. i’m a big fan of both. but yeah, redmond has finally become really surreal now, even around home. that’s where its the strangest anyways. no big deal though.

hangign around today with my brother’s friends was great though. all of his friends are just morons, but they’re rad. they definatly keep it real. well at least to some degree. and of course hanging around with ben and those guys is rad too. ben made the greatest comment yesterday so i’ll throw this up. i didn’t save the convo, but i remember that he said “why look for the truth when i can just make wild rumors based on nothing” (or something very veyr close to that) i sat there stunned for a second, and then just told him “that is one of the greatest points you have ever made”.

it just makes so much more sense to make up a truth for yourself then have others dictate to you what it is. and besides, rumors are sure more entertaining than most real life stuff.

so i have some sort of 4 day weekend this week, pretty much 5 since i only went to my class at 9. which almost kills it as a day off, just due to the fact that you have to get up early, but all i’ve been doing from then on is feeling sore and playing vids. i’ll clean the house, soon i suppose, we had a little party last night for abra, and it was pretty rad. i mean that whole not drinking on blood thinners thing just went straight out the window, and i had to cut loose last night. i probably won’t do that for awhile though, cause i was pretty ruined last night, as per usual. at least when i get ruined, i don’t cut corners. i can’t believe our neighbors didn’t complain or anything, i guess we started around 7 pm though, and people left around 11 and stuff, so i guess we weren’t up too late.

fuck school. finals are coming, and now i’ve gotta start studying not only all this new crap that’s goign to be 50% of the final, and then review everything else i learned this quarter, so, it blows. it’s cool though, i’m fine in all my classes.

good god my keyboard is dirty, i feel like i should just throw it away and buy a new one, cause i don’t feel like cleaning this one. maybe i’ll clean it, and if it breaks, then i can buy a new one. plus i could pick out all the keys and throw them at people or something. or set them on fire.baaaaahhhh

SHOUT

SHOUT

LET IT ALL OUT

THESE ARE THE THINGS I CAN DO WITHOUT

COME ON

I’M TALKING TO YOU

COME ON

its gonna be nice to go home for a bit, and chill around the house again. going home is like taking a all expenses paid vacation. when you don’t see your parents all the time, they’re definatly more bearable, plus they know you’re psuedo responsible, and the food is free. i’ll have the mcescort back for a few days so i can chill in seattle, where ben and i can be anti-social, and keep things real.

allright, its time to clean

i am rad

ok, so i was sitting aroudn tongiht, and people were talking about my hair and how long its gotten, and then making a comment to the effect of “that was a perfect ryan comment”.

i’ve always wondered how i look to other people.

it must be funny.