ok, so i’m probably going to get shit for this post and i probably deserve it, cause i sound pretty damn arrogant in this tirade, but then again i was drunk, although i doubt that is little excuse. i still must post this now, and i know it. this is somethign that i can’t just let dissappear, cause deep down i think i’m proud of it…i don’t know… i just can’t differentiate between selfeshness and bullshit anymore, and anyways the end is pretty damn funny. TV strippers are always funny.

crutch free! says:

haha ben, you give me too much credit it hink

crutch free! says:

i don’t know if i was quite on the verge of genius

crutch free! says:

i guess i could have been though

crutch free! says:

can’t be too sure…

crutch free! says:

GENIUS

crutch free! says:

i’m lways on the erge of genius

crutch free! says:

always, verge

crutch free! says:

too drunk to really differentiate i suppose

crutch free! says:

well actually, i know i’m on the verge of genius, but you are one of the few people who realizes it

crutch free! says:

actually, pretty much the only person

crutch free! says:

so i totally know you and me are down, cause while other people question me, i know you just accept it, just like i accept your genius

crutch free! says:

sheesh, too much drama around here i don’t give a damn about, because people are just too childish to handle it i think

crutch free! says:

i mean i can try and talk to them about ti, but it’s their deal not mine

crutch free! says:

but odammit, they’re still my friends, so what the hell am i supposed to do?

crutch free! says:

oh yeah….be myself, and deal withmy shit, and let other people dal with theirs, cause i’m sure i got my own shit figured out, cause its mine

crutch free! says:

i swear, things have gotten more childish and dramatic since i got out of high school

crutch free! says:

can i get an amen?

crutch free! says:

dude, i miss living with you guys, cause you especially ben, i think you had things figured out way before i did, i had to get through an abusive relationship before i realized things didn’ mean shit, whereas you pretty much had it figured out fromt he start, and for that, you’re my hero

crutch free! says:

and i know i’m your hero as well, so i know we’re pretty much on the same level, and that is rad enough for me

crutch free! says:

cause it’s funny, i think “why can’t my friends accept the way they are?”, and then i think abuot it some more, and i see why they can’t accept they way they aer, and that makes it funny to me

crutch free! says:

but of course, i can’t tel them its funny to me, cause they might take it the wrong way…but i know that they’ll get tot eh same point and understand why i think its so funny

crutch free! says:

and that is why, ben, you are my hero, ause i know you’re a;ready at that point, and besides adam, you’re the only one who would understand why its so goddamn funny that people put themselves through such personal hell

crutch free! says:

so basically, you are rad, and you know it, just like i am drunk and i know it

crutch free! says:

genius buds from drunkedness, and you know it

crutch free! says:

dammit, wish i had some genius right now…oh well, you’ll be sleepin’ till 1 tomorrow anyways, so i know you’ll be keepin it real…

crutch free! says:

sigh…how do i keep from telling people to shut the hell up and deal with it?….oh yeah, relaize that i don’t have to deal with it, cause i can sit back and laugh about the whole thing…i just wish i had you to sit back here with me and laugh with me, cause it would make it that mjuch funnier

crutch free! says:

ok, on a completely differnt note there are TV strippers

crutch free! says:

“hi, my name is jenniofer, and i”llbe your host on TV strippers”

crutch free! says:

“you can call our 900 number at any time, and be connected to hot, single girls”

crutch free! says:

this is rad shit dude, i mean, canadian channels are mostly bad, but once you get past 3 am its pretty awesome

crutch free! says:

its better than live links

crutch free! says:

“mom sais, be a good cook, and find yourself a man….i can cook!”

mind going too much….too much physics and ochem…need right brain realese…..

ok, here’s the deal, studyign for two tets on the same day totally blows, cause its hard to stay focused on one or the other. but here are a few things to keep your mind on track:

1. http://www.davidhasselhoff.com

This guy has gotta be the biggest mangler onthe face of the earth, i don’t know if his movie legacy has come out yet, but if it has not it must be seen in theaters the day it comes out. if it already has, then it is grounds for drinking and laughing really hard the entire movie. his song is just amazing too, like spellbinding and life changing at the same time. just check out his multimedia section, and some of his pictures and you will see why this man is a mangler

2. Boney James
Another huge mangler. for those of you who be disrespectin’ the smooth jazz (straight up kenny G style, foo) then you best give this stuff a listen. i highly reccommend “ain’t no sunshine” on his album seduction. this song is awesome cause you feel out of place if you’re not fucking a woman while listening to it. this is straight up, slow lovin, intense fucking, kind of music. the kind of stuff that just makes you think of cinemax. ahhhh sweet skinemax.

3. Masterbation

I mean, really, where would our society be today if we couldn’t manually get ourselves off? having to depend on others for basuc needs, sheesh. well sure, maybe if we ddin’t have to go through all this courtship stuff, maybe it would be unecesary. but seeing as we do, and that we can’t just drive into town and grab some girl and ruin her before dumping her on the sidewalk. you just gotta help yourself. you know what would be a funny concept in our society today? if we had places where people just had sex. i mean, if you’re a guy and a girl, and you’re feelin’ horny just bop on down to the local sexatorium where after a brief wait, you’ll walk into a dark room with someone else who is equally horny, who you can’t see, get down to business and leave. ithe wait would probably be a hell of a lot shorter for women. and i guess it would probably be alot less gratifying for the women if the guy just came and was like “see ya”. but i’m sure these are problems that can be remidied. yeha, if we had sexatoriums, it would probably be pretty sweet. think of how much business bars would lose! well jesus, if you just started serving alcohol there it would be a bar….good god, bars are just sexatoriums where you can’t have sex there. i mean, why don’t bars just crank it up a notch and supply rooms? why make your patrons go home with just one girl when they could have several for a couple of hours. i mean, you go out to the dance floor, start getting on with soem girl, and then walk up to the bartender and say, “it’s miller time” and he would smile and wink, throwing his white bartender towel over hsi shoulder and hand you a key to your sex room. where you just go in, and finish in about an hour or so, depending on how generous you feel. then you come out of there, and you’re still drunk so you’re still horny, so you can go out and find another girl if you want. then we would actually would have sexatoriums! good god, the social implications this could have would be staggering. man, i bet that would just turn into prostituion real quick. so jesus, why don’t we just leagalize everything dammit! how much happier would i be if i could just bop on down tot he sexatorium, and just have some fun. I BET MY LIFE WOULD BE FREAKING SWESOME. not just kinda awesome….BUT FREAKING AWESOME. then just cut responsibilities and it’d be dope.

ok, so i kinda got sidetracked

4. Studying ahead

this is damn near impossible, but i did it and it actually makes things easier and allows me to waste massive quantites of time throwing out stupid blogs like this

5. Put it in perspective

i mean, its only a test right? god’s not gonna kill you if you fail a test. besides, you can always take classes over.

6. Internet

the internet is great, they are basically one of the biggest black holes of time ever. i mean, its nice to be able to keep in touch with alot of people that i normally wouldn’t cause it would cost money, but good god the amoutn of time i spend looking at porn or other equally worthless stuff is just staggering. at least ben has it right, with a tv next to his computer. if i could count up all the dead time i sat there just waiting for peopel to respond or something, while i could be doing something else besides blankly staring at the computer screen, i’d probably gain back a couple of years. at least ben can say that he filled it with quality programming. but man, the distractions are just too great. i always lose to them. its too easy to end up at http://www.davidhasselhoff.com (as scary as that is)

7.SHOOT ME IN THE HEAD

BETTER OFF DEAD! i wish it was teh weekend all-freakin’-ready, cause then i wouldn’t have to worry about stupid tests. and to have fun you must be drunk, cause sobriety is way too boring. well not boring, in fact it can be pretty damn dramatic and exciting, but it sure ain’t the same as when you’ve drank a fifth of something. now THOSE are the fun stuff. well at least they put everything else in perspective anyways.

But yeah, shoot me in the head. i’d rather be doing anythign than goddamn physics. so ben, drive up to bellingham, shoot me in the head and then shoot yourself. and sweet sweet de(liberation)ath is our reward.

GOD BLESS AMERICA AND EVERYTHIGN DERIVED FROM IT

where has today gone?

time creeps around, slinking….slinking…and then BAM, you got two tests on you before you even know the quarter starts. its just one drunkin stupor after another until all the night syou have drank just blur together. wait was last night the night i went and fell over tryign to dance on my crutches, or was that the night that i was wearing a suit around? beats me, one night of drinking is very much like the previous one. money gone you don’t remember spedning, a kinda of feeling where you’re right on the edge of feeling normal, but not quite… i swear that its all ass backwards up here. i think that i drink way more during the week than i do over the weekend. i guess last saturday was a little nuts….lots of everclear in a short amount of time is pretty crazy. well not too crazy, i mean i just got plastered, stumbled around not really knowing what i was doing, then got kicked out of some bars. and got dragged home by chris. man i’m lucky i’ve only been tea bagged since i started drinking, cause i’ve noticed that when i pass out, there’s no turning back. i don’t wake up until at least 5 hours later. and in that 5 hour window, i’m completley oblvious. i’ve been told i do things, say things, whatever, but until i wake up of my own accord, i can’t be snapped out of it. which is rad i suppose. i mean, at least i don’t wake up feeling incredibly shitty with a headache and spinning. i swear that last friday…? sigh….they really do all blend together…well one night last week, i went out, got trashed came home, slept and when i went to class the next morning i was pretty drunk for the first 3 hours of being there. it was great. i don’t think i could have possibly had any more fun in that godawful biology class i’m taking. and then around noon or so, i just felt fine, the drunkedness wore off, and there was no hangover. so the moral of the story? if you’re gonna get plowed one random weekday night, make sure you do it well enough that you wake up drunk enough the next day to deal with it.

i guess i could just start drinking in the morning.

note to ben: drink in the morning, i’m sure it’ll make things go alot faster

sigh…well guess i better study now and do shit i need to get out of the way before i’m intoxicated by the devil’s brew and the last thing i want to do is homework.