ok, so yeah, i sit here int he computer lab waiting for my bus, which i missed by like 10 seconds 40 minutes ago. ah well, at lest i finished this bullshit bio paper, leaving my weekend free to do more meaningful things. i mean, i reall yliked last quarter’s bio cause it was cells and molecular stuff, but i realize now that cannot stand ecology. at least that’s one more thing out of the way of major declaration…

but yeah anyways, chillin, chillin, chilln, always witht he chillin’. if you ain’t keepin it real, then you only be doin’ yoself a disservice. I went out last night for like the first time in a long while, and it was quite possibly the raddest outing i’ve had in a long time. last night was chanta’s birthday, and i hadn’t had school all day, so i basically sat around and did jack, with soem light studying, and we headed over to chantas around 9 or so. we loaded up on wine, and i had some various homecooked food, and we waited around there till about 10:30 drinking steadily more and more, while waiting for others to show up.

so by the time we finally get going and get everyone organized, we end up at the up for about an hour or so, where we did the up thing. you sit around with pitchers and drink lots of beer and talk noisily. besides pool and golden tee, i mean there’s not really much else to do there. i guess you could go hit on girls or something, but it just seems counter productive to having a good time to me. but yeah, i ran into loads of people that i hadn’t seenin awhile there, it didn’t seem like we were there long at all, caue i kept having conversations with people i hadn’t seen in awhile. chris and i were passing the flask around all night too, although i think i drank more of the southern comfort than him, cause i had it on my person most of the night.

but after hanging around there for about an hour we walked down to rumors, and we were already trashed so we were pretty much on par with everyone else there. but the thing was, is that there wasn’t really anyone there. it was beautiful. i just remember there was like no one on the dance floor really, and there was house music of course, so we all pile in drunkendly and just usurp the dance floor. there was like 10 of us just up front dancing, and although my leg felt fine then, i really probably shouldn’t have danced on it….oh well, it was still worth it. but i basically just danced the entire time i was there, and it felt great. i was a nice massive sweaty mass (or aqua man) and i even got away without getting hit on by any guys despite my probably flamboyant appeal. but yeah, dancing on stage, dancing around, dancing with rita, it was all a blast. i mean even people like tryo and parks were dancing, it was great. i swear that club just cuts you loose when you get there, its just infectious when you’re drunk.

side note: parks and troy told me about this last night, and it has gotta be one of those things that you hear about but never really come into contact with. just kinda like one of those maxim tru lies or something. but anyways, one of troy’s friends goes out one night, runs into some random girl out side of rumors, and ends up with her back at his car, and she schlobs his knob for him. so he goes into rumors, and eventually this tall asian girl comes up and offers to suck him off, so he goes outside with her, and they go into his car again, except this time, while she’s going down on him, he reaches down to finger her….only to grab a big handful of man wang. good god, i don’t even know why that guy let that kind of story slip. that’s just something you take to the grave….also makes you kinda wonder about the first “girl” he got head froom.

but anyways, we had to walk back to chanta’s house after that and that was an adventure, caus ei was trashed and my knee was already starting to hurt, but we made it back home and i woke up sitting on the couch around6 in the morning.

what an absolutly rad night. peope need to have birthdays more often.

allright, i gotta run to my bus here, peace

things i’ve noticed latley:

1. there is beer in every room of our house.

this means EVERY room. this house permeates with beer, like if this house could sweat, there would be beer comign out of it. we’ve always got beer in the fridge, there’s beer in the bathroom, beer on the porch, beer in the tavern (well, of course) beer in the garage…everywhere. i’m not sure if this is rad or not, but my gut tells me that this is the awesomest awesome ever to awesome, so i’ll go with my gut.

2. i’m getting harrier.

i didn’t know if i just missed puberty or not, but i still couldn’t grow a respectable beard if i let it grow for the rest f the year. i swear i would have to shave every 20 minutes of a day for a week with a dull rusty bic disposable to get that kind of irritation on, then maybe i could do it. but then all of the sudden, i have to shave like once every 4 days, which is getting up there, i sprouted chest hair, and now i’ve noticed that the hair next to my wrists that is thickening, and now on the pinky side on the back of my hand, i’m getting little tufts of hair. what the hell, i start getting all this stuff when i’m 21? isn’t this supposed to happen when i’m like 19 or something? ah well, maybe i’ll be a wolf man by the time i’m 26 with hair all over my back and shoulders and stuff. then i’ll have to take nair baths and what not to reacquire my current level of sexiness.

3. tents are rad.

BAN AND MATT: whip out the smallest tent that you can get or find, and just spend some tiem in there with the gravity. this is a rad way to spend some time, let me tell you. almost as good as a closet and happy hardcore…..almost.

4. cars.

internal combustion engines have gotta be one of the craziest monky inventions that has come along in awhile. i mean, monkies figuring out how to control the atom is impressive and everything, but damn…thiose cars are just damned silly. i almost think that cars have been the largest influence on the spreading of our society in the 20th century. if we couldn’t travel the distances with cars that we could, there’s no way that we could spread the way that we have. there’s not enough supplies in a certain area to support the huge metropolises that we have created without being able to bring things in. and horses and carts just wouldn’t be able to cover the massive quantity that we humans need these days. this country would be nowhere near this big, i mean we would still have trains, but we’re not about to cover this entire country with tracks that goes out to everyone’s house. people would have to live in towns, and there’s only so many people that can be supported by a train stop in a certain area. without cars we wouldn’t be able to move the volumes of things taht we do now, therefore keeping us from spreading the way that we have.. i mean, all that stuff like agriculture, and fire is important and everything but that stuff just allows us to live, not to live with a population of hundred of millions.

5. I’m gettign sick of porn.

i don’t know if i overloaded or something, but i just don’t go on my rounds like i used to. i don’t even feel like downloading movies right now. i just don’t really want to go through all the crap. if there was a page full of links where all i had to do was right click on them and download it, i could do that. but it takes too long to browse through all the usual pages (where there are more than 30) and just download things over and over. i don’t even spend much time on my computer these days, and i just don’t feel like spending my time getting more porn. the fact that i have to sort through my hard drive and clean it up AGAIN cause its full mght also have an effect. but latley, i just don’t care about porn, or even whacking off that much right now. normally, its like clockwork to masterbate before going to bed. but i’ve been blowing it off on more than just one occasion.

GOOD GOD, I’M GONNA BE IMPOTENT, I GOTTA START MASTERBATING 5 TIEMS A DAY, RIGHT NOW!!!

ok, so maybe its not that bad, i mean i still get horny, and masterbation is still great. i just don’t want to spend the time to download the shit.

6. Everyone Mangles.

i swear i should write a book about manglers, and just compile it into one gigantic massive, illustrious, guide to manglers. man, it would take my whole life to make somethign that comprehensive though, because Everyone Mangles. no matter who you are, you are a mangler in one sense or another. mangling is just a fact of life. if you are alive you will mangle. now of course there are different degrees of mangling, but that’s why i need to write a book about it, to educate people about what is a mangler, and what type they are. because soem people just can’t really see how much of a mangler the people around them are. most are even blind to their own manglness. i suppose we all are…but you can at least have a concept of it if not a complete understanding.

Everybody Mangles: A Mangler’s Guide to Mangling in the United States.

that’ll be the title of my book, and i’ll tour the country giving lectures at all the prestigious universities, getting paid as much as bill clinton to talk in various locations, educating the nation that is by far the largest mangling nation in the world. we think we control it all, but basically we’re just mangling like everyone else.

number of times a derivative of mangle was used in those 8 lines: 15

number of times i got distracted by mike while writing this:2

number of tiems sex popped into my head while i was writing this: 0 (is this freakin’ possible?)

number of people who mangled while i wrote this: too numerous to count

ok, so i’m probably going to get shit for this post and i probably deserve it, cause i sound pretty damn arrogant in this tirade, but then again i was drunk, although i doubt that is little excuse. i still must post this now, and i know it. this is somethign that i can’t just let dissappear, cause deep down i think i’m proud of it…i don’t know… i just can’t differentiate between selfeshness and bullshit anymore, and anyways the end is pretty damn funny. TV strippers are always funny.

crutch free! says:

haha ben, you give me too much credit it hink

crutch free! says:

i don’t know if i was quite on the verge of genius

crutch free! says:

i guess i could have been though

crutch free! says:

can’t be too sure…

crutch free! says:

GENIUS

crutch free! says:

i’m lways on the erge of genius

crutch free! says:

always, verge

crutch free! says:

too drunk to really differentiate i suppose

crutch free! says:

well actually, i know i’m on the verge of genius, but you are one of the few people who realizes it

crutch free! says:

actually, pretty much the only person

crutch free! says:

so i totally know you and me are down, cause while other people question me, i know you just accept it, just like i accept your genius

crutch free! says:

sheesh, too much drama around here i don’t give a damn about, because people are just too childish to handle it i think

crutch free! says:

i mean i can try and talk to them about ti, but it’s their deal not mine

crutch free! says:

but odammit, they’re still my friends, so what the hell am i supposed to do?

crutch free! says:

oh yeah….be myself, and deal withmy shit, and let other people dal with theirs, cause i’m sure i got my own shit figured out, cause its mine

crutch free! says:

i swear, things have gotten more childish and dramatic since i got out of high school

crutch free! says:

can i get an amen?

crutch free! says:

dude, i miss living with you guys, cause you especially ben, i think you had things figured out way before i did, i had to get through an abusive relationship before i realized things didn’ mean shit, whereas you pretty much had it figured out fromt he start, and for that, you’re my hero

crutch free! says:

and i know i’m your hero as well, so i know we’re pretty much on the same level, and that is rad enough for me

crutch free! says:

cause it’s funny, i think “why can’t my friends accept the way they are?”, and then i think abuot it some more, and i see why they can’t accept they way they aer, and that makes it funny to me

crutch free! says:

but of course, i can’t tel them its funny to me, cause they might take it the wrong way…but i know that they’ll get tot eh same point and understand why i think its so funny

crutch free! says:

and that is why, ben, you are my hero, ause i know you’re a;ready at that point, and besides adam, you’re the only one who would understand why its so goddamn funny that people put themselves through such personal hell

crutch free! says:

so basically, you are rad, and you know it, just like i am drunk and i know it

crutch free! says:

genius buds from drunkedness, and you know it

crutch free! says:

dammit, wish i had some genius right now…oh well, you’ll be sleepin’ till 1 tomorrow anyways, so i know you’ll be keepin it real…

crutch free! says:

sigh…how do i keep from telling people to shut the hell up and deal with it?….oh yeah, relaize that i don’t have to deal with it, cause i can sit back and laugh about the whole thing…i just wish i had you to sit back here with me and laugh with me, cause it would make it that mjuch funnier

crutch free! says:

ok, on a completely differnt note there are TV strippers

crutch free! says:

“hi, my name is jenniofer, and i”llbe your host on TV strippers”

crutch free! says:

“you can call our 900 number at any time, and be connected to hot, single girls”

crutch free! says:

this is rad shit dude, i mean, canadian channels are mostly bad, but once you get past 3 am its pretty awesome

crutch free! says:

its better than live links

crutch free! says:

“mom sais, be a good cook, and find yourself a man….i can cook!”

mind going too much….too much physics and ochem…need right brain realese…..

ok, here’s the deal, studyign for two tets on the same day totally blows, cause its hard to stay focused on one or the other. but here are a few things to keep your mind on track:

1. http://www.davidhasselhoff.com

This guy has gotta be the biggest mangler onthe face of the earth, i don’t know if his movie legacy has come out yet, but if it has not it must be seen in theaters the day it comes out. if it already has, then it is grounds for drinking and laughing really hard the entire movie. his song is just amazing too, like spellbinding and life changing at the same time. just check out his multimedia section, and some of his pictures and you will see why this man is a mangler

2. Boney James
Another huge mangler. for those of you who be disrespectin’ the smooth jazz (straight up kenny G style, foo) then you best give this stuff a listen. i highly reccommend “ain’t no sunshine” on his album seduction. this song is awesome cause you feel out of place if you’re not fucking a woman while listening to it. this is straight up, slow lovin, intense fucking, kind of music. the kind of stuff that just makes you think of cinemax. ahhhh sweet skinemax.

3. Masterbation

I mean, really, where would our society be today if we couldn’t manually get ourselves off? having to depend on others for basuc needs, sheesh. well sure, maybe if we ddin’t have to go through all this courtship stuff, maybe it would be unecesary. but seeing as we do, and that we can’t just drive into town and grab some girl and ruin her before dumping her on the sidewalk. you just gotta help yourself. you know what would be a funny concept in our society today? if we had places where people just had sex. i mean, if you’re a guy and a girl, and you’re feelin’ horny just bop on down to the local sexatorium where after a brief wait, you’ll walk into a dark room with someone else who is equally horny, who you can’t see, get down to business and leave. ithe wait would probably be a hell of a lot shorter for women. and i guess it would probably be alot less gratifying for the women if the guy just came and was like “see ya”. but i’m sure these are problems that can be remidied. yeha, if we had sexatoriums, it would probably be pretty sweet. think of how much business bars would lose! well jesus, if you just started serving alcohol there it would be a bar….good god, bars are just sexatoriums where you can’t have sex there. i mean, why don’t bars just crank it up a notch and supply rooms? why make your patrons go home with just one girl when they could have several for a couple of hours. i mean, you go out to the dance floor, start getting on with soem girl, and then walk up to the bartender and say, “it’s miller time” and he would smile and wink, throwing his white bartender towel over hsi shoulder and hand you a key to your sex room. where you just go in, and finish in about an hour or so, depending on how generous you feel. then you come out of there, and you’re still drunk so you’re still horny, so you can go out and find another girl if you want. then we would actually would have sexatoriums! good god, the social implications this could have would be staggering. man, i bet that would just turn into prostituion real quick. so jesus, why don’t we just leagalize everything dammit! how much happier would i be if i could just bop on down tot he sexatorium, and just have some fun. I BET MY LIFE WOULD BE FREAKING SWESOME. not just kinda awesome….BUT FREAKING AWESOME. then just cut responsibilities and it’d be dope.

ok, so i kinda got sidetracked

4. Studying ahead

this is damn near impossible, but i did it and it actually makes things easier and allows me to waste massive quantites of time throwing out stupid blogs like this

5. Put it in perspective

i mean, its only a test right? god’s not gonna kill you if you fail a test. besides, you can always take classes over.

6. Internet

the internet is great, they are basically one of the biggest black holes of time ever. i mean, its nice to be able to keep in touch with alot of people that i normally wouldn’t cause it would cost money, but good god the amoutn of time i spend looking at porn or other equally worthless stuff is just staggering. at least ben has it right, with a tv next to his computer. if i could count up all the dead time i sat there just waiting for peopel to respond or something, while i could be doing something else besides blankly staring at the computer screen, i’d probably gain back a couple of years. at least ben can say that he filled it with quality programming. but man, the distractions are just too great. i always lose to them. its too easy to end up at http://www.davidhasselhoff.com (as scary as that is)

7.SHOOT ME IN THE HEAD

BETTER OFF DEAD! i wish it was teh weekend all-freakin’-ready, cause then i wouldn’t have to worry about stupid tests. and to have fun you must be drunk, cause sobriety is way too boring. well not boring, in fact it can be pretty damn dramatic and exciting, but it sure ain’t the same as when you’ve drank a fifth of something. now THOSE are the fun stuff. well at least they put everything else in perspective anyways.

But yeah, shoot me in the head. i’d rather be doing anythign than goddamn physics. so ben, drive up to bellingham, shoot me in the head and then shoot yourself. and sweet sweet de(liberation)ath is our reward.

GOD BLESS AMERICA AND EVERYTHIGN DERIVED FROM IT

where has today gone?

time creeps around, slinking….slinking…and then BAM, you got two tests on you before you even know the quarter starts. its just one drunkin stupor after another until all the night syou have drank just blur together. wait was last night the night i went and fell over tryign to dance on my crutches, or was that the night that i was wearing a suit around? beats me, one night of drinking is very much like the previous one. money gone you don’t remember spedning, a kinda of feeling where you’re right on the edge of feeling normal, but not quite… i swear that its all ass backwards up here. i think that i drink way more during the week than i do over the weekend. i guess last saturday was a little nuts….lots of everclear in a short amount of time is pretty crazy. well not too crazy, i mean i just got plastered, stumbled around not really knowing what i was doing, then got kicked out of some bars. and got dragged home by chris. man i’m lucky i’ve only been tea bagged since i started drinking, cause i’ve noticed that when i pass out, there’s no turning back. i don’t wake up until at least 5 hours later. and in that 5 hour window, i’m completley oblvious. i’ve been told i do things, say things, whatever, but until i wake up of my own accord, i can’t be snapped out of it. which is rad i suppose. i mean, at least i don’t wake up feeling incredibly shitty with a headache and spinning. i swear that last friday…? sigh….they really do all blend together…well one night last week, i went out, got trashed came home, slept and when i went to class the next morning i was pretty drunk for the first 3 hours of being there. it was great. i don’t think i could have possibly had any more fun in that godawful biology class i’m taking. and then around noon or so, i just felt fine, the drunkedness wore off, and there was no hangover. so the moral of the story? if you’re gonna get plowed one random weekday night, make sure you do it well enough that you wake up drunk enough the next day to deal with it.

i guess i could just start drinking in the morning.

note to ben: drink in the morning, i’m sure it’ll make things go alot faster

sigh…well guess i better study now and do shit i need to get out of the way before i’m intoxicated by the devil’s brew and the last thing i want to do is homework.

jesus, this has been some streak, i can’t believe i haven’t blogged since i got my leg fixed up…

the rain is awesome, i’ve missed it so much. its pretty much been dead sunny since i got my leg operated on (fate, as usual, is not without a sense of humor) but i woke up today looked out side, and it was overcast, and shortly after it began to rain. sundays are great days for it to be rainy. if i was swtill working, i probably wouldn’t want it to rain i suppose, cause that just turns an otherwise mudane task to a miserable mundane task. when you can take it in small doses with a guarentee that you’ll be able to get dry and warm, the rain kicks ass.

school school school. this year is gonna blow, especially if i don’t get my ass in gear. i just don’t have any drive to study, and classes are starting slow. but i got my first tests coming up on the 11th, and today’s already the 29th. i mean, i got less than two weeks now before i have my first tests. two weeks? school just freakin started, and already i gotta worry about this shit. now i remember why i didn’t want to go back to school. oh well…the scenery on campus is nice i suppose, although everyone seems like a baby. last night mike and i drove around, and we would see groups of guys with backpacks, or just caravans of people moving around the neighborhoods surrounding campus, and all we could do was laugh. i mean, that was funny shit to think we used to do that “how are we gonna get alcohol tonight?” routine. i can only imagine the amoutn of partying that went on in the dorms where they had to make sure no alcohol stinked up the halls and keeping the noise down and whatnot. man, its nice to be able to buy my own alcohol. and good god, i swear that all the clothes designers are in cahoots and that they’re all male, cause they’re just trying to make women’s clothes, tighter, more revealing, and just plain scandalous. its kinda like channels like fox slowly integrating more swearing, more skin, and more violence onto its shows. its just done gradually enough so that it just slowly integrates itself into the mainstream and no one cares anymore. i mean basically, the way that styles are heading now, in another decade or so, when all those girls show up for tehir first day of college all dressed up, they’ll basically be wearing nipple caps and a thong. i mean i’m not complaining or anything, but i don’t remember girls quite as skanked out when i was starting college. its nice being older to appreciate it though. i mean i can wander to school in the same clothes i’ve been in for a couple of days, unshowerede, hair everywhere, totally scrubby, and not giving a damn. school is nice in that respect cause you just kinda show up. these crutches have got to go though. I HATE CRUTCHES! jesus it really sucks when you have to make multiple trips doing somethign just cause you can’t carry anything in your hands. its really really really inconvinient. and jesus, walking distances of more than 100 feet, and i’m breaking a sweat. at least i can put some pressure on my leg now so i don’t have to support all my weight on those crutches. they are so hated.

at least i can do stuff again though, even if it is just riding on an exercise bike. i mean these weeks of having no obligations, and just being able to sit around have been awesome, especially since i got grandia 2. its awesome, me and mike just switch off witht he PS2, him playing hot shots 3, and me playing grandia. we sit on the couch alot and just play vids. i have stooped this low into video game debauchery in awhile, and its really nice to kinda lose myself in video game land again. its kinda fun, but after riding the exercise bike and using the weight bench here again, i’m remembering how nice it feels to get in some aerobic exercise and some anarobic while you’re at it. it’s a nice form of escape anyways.

bellingham rocks, and 203 fucking rocks, its awesome to be back up here, but i am kinda already nostalgic for the seattle days. i mean, me, ben, and matt had some fun times, and i still think the summer was waaaaay to short. but its good to be back up here, chilling in the bars and drinking, pretty much fell into the swing of things real quick. the wudar tavern is the greatest. you can chill, listen to music, play pool, sit at the bar, all in teh comfort of your home. and now we got a TV in there now, so last ngith point break was on. god what an awesome movie. talk about keanu being at the peak of his career. him teamed up witht the world’s sexiest man, good ol’ swazye makes for a dynamic duo. man, the part at the end where keanu lets patrick go, so that he can die catching the ultimate wave, looking disdainfully out to sea, and chucking his badge uncaringly into the ocean is just one of those classic cinematic moments. i mean, if that doesn’t sum up an emotional moment in film history, i don’t know what is.

ok, i just had to document this though, cause it was too funny:

after a particularily strong rum and coke, and a whoel lot of sawing, adam finally manages to get his bearded dragon cage mostly set up. feeling particularily good, he instructs fellow 203 members, ryan and mike to shout his name as he walks in the door, a la norm at cheers. as he walks in, mike and ryan comply, but adm, not watchign where he’s going, walks straight into the door of his cage he bought the day before and snaps it off completley. at which point adam falls to his knees, going “noooooooooo” and mike and ryan proceeding to howl with laughter. adam looks very distraught, and procalims “i just bought this yesterday!” which is met by more laughter from mike and ryan. the end.

so yeah, things are pretty much back to normal up here, and i’m gonna go out for a little bit i suppose, so i can get a router and set up a network here.

rock over london, rock on chicago.

wheaties: breakfast of champions

so yeah, sitting, nothign to do, finally got my leg feelin’ somewhat descent so i can sit in this chair for alittle bit. i really feel like blogging, but i don’t really know what to throw down at the moment. but i know i got something tosay. something tugging up from teh depths of my chest screaming to get out. like i got something important to say or something. like i ever do.

i don’t know, feeling abstract tonight i suppose. these last few weeks have been kinda funny. it just seems like i’m going nowhere, but its like i have no choice about it. like, even if i wanted to be heading in a certain direction, i couldn’t. fucking dial up, this shit is so slow, that’s why i’m blogging, cause i can’;t do anything else really but just write shit down. and what is it, what is it, what’s tryign to get out of me right now? should i even be blogging right now? hmmmm, basically, i want out.

i want out of this life i have created for myself, not because i’m unhappy with it i suppose, but because i’m sick of dealing with it. i just don’t want to have obligations anymore, period. i don’t want to have obligations to other people, and i don’t want them to have obligations towards me. i just want to start over at square one where i don’t owe anybody anything, and nobody owes anything to me. like sometimes i feel like i’m doing things cause i’m obligated to other people, not cause i want to do it. so my life has this quality where i’m just following a line, cause i have things i have to do. HAVE to do, not choose to do. god no wonder our society is so crazy, being brought up to be so dependant. nothing i can do about it now but deal with it though. so that’s what life has become for me, not living, but dealing. just doin’ it for the lack of anything better to do. no wonder i want to validate my existance through stuff. stuff is great. if i have more stuff, i can at least look at that and say “wow, i’ve done something with my life, cause i have stuff” i mean, at least i can point towards that and prove it to someone. at least that’s an absolute, i suppose, at least in our society. i was thinking about the whole absloute thing, and i was wondering what kind of world we would live in if we didn’t have absolutes. what if a pen felt differently everytime you picked it up? what if everytime you knocked on wood, it would make a different sound? of course this is possible, but if it did feel differently or sound differently then it wouldn’t have the same properties as it did in the first place. sure wood isn’t going to sound the same once you waterlog it, but its not going to have the same properties as it did before. so it is absolute, but just a different form. i f you define something to have certain properties, and YOU define it to be like that, then its gonna retain those properties. it can’t just change because it feels like it, something’s gotta act upon it to change it.bah, maybe i’m full of it, i think i just don’t want to accept the fact that its possible to live in a world that is non-absolute. where nothing can be defined cause nothing has a solid definition, since everything is so grey. i mean, you couldn’t have the grey without mixing the black and white right? and just cause there may be a grey, that doesn’t cancel out the black and white.

fuck it, i’m gonna go lay back down on the couch and chill in my cpm thing

so here i sit in front of my computer, probably for the last time in awhile…i’m kinda interested to see what i can and can’t do once i get this surgury done. i’m kinda making it out to be worse than it is in my head i think, but man, i have to spen like 12 to 15 hours a day on this funny looking machine that flexes my knee for me. just got it fitted today, looks like its gonna be an uncomfortable for a week. i swear, i am one of the most kinetic people ever. basically my biggest fear ever is being forced to sit int he same place for an extended period of time. i cannot sit still, i’m always playing with something in my pocket, something to keep my body doing something. i mean, on the drive home i spent most of it chewing on a fingernail, and i noticed that i wasn’t doing any of the other tapping, squirming, singing, and anythign else i would do to keep me occupied. i’ve always noticed that at movies, i’m like the only one adjusting my position. like everyone else is just still and sit during the entire movie, but i shift my weight, slouch, un-slouch, stretch, etc. i remember back in 10th grade where our teacher made us sit in one place for the period because we were watching a video about how some POW’s were treated and they had to sit in a little cage not much bigger than 4 feet by 4 feet, so they couldn’t stretch out. i remember by halfway through class i was about ready to explode. at the end of class, i wanted to scream. i’d probably tear out my throat with my bare hands rather than deal with a fate like that…

speaking of movies, i managed to stay awake for XXX this time and it was the greatest summer movie ever. hands down. i was laughing the entire movie, pretty much in amusement. i remember at the point where he held on to that cross bar and got above that avalanche while everyone else got owned. it was dead silent in the theater while he was about to hit that moment where you know his hand is going to come out of the snow, and i just wanted to put both my hands in the air and scream at the top of my lungs. it just seemed like it would have been appropriate if i had just been cheering on vin like he could hear me throughout the movie. i laughed so hard when those russian guards were talkign though:

Russian Dude #1: How’s it going?

Russian Dude #2: Life is shit.

Russian Dude #1: Well, what are you gonna do?

god, that was fucking genius writing. you can’t just pull this stuff out of your ass, you gotta think it through and admire it.

good god, what a surreal weekend, lots of misfortune, but i didn’t really notice it for some reason. i mean, friday i got my cd player jacked at some point in the night, on saturday i got jacked for 70 bucks while trying to buy slayer tickets, then today the starter on my car died while i was in bellingham so i had to have someone hotwire it for me so i could get back down here before 4 to get fitted for that knee flexing machine. i don’t care about any of it though, like it didn’t ruin my weekend. friday was just some low key buffoonery with just chilling drinking, and wanderin. then on saturday i went and hung around with blake in the afternoon and just got blastedly shibby as i tend to do when i’m with him. wandered home because i was supposed to go out shopping with my dad, but that kinda got blown off, so i met up with adam, mikey, and adam’s little bro and his friend, steve and grant. we tried to get into slayer but of course it was sold out, so we went freestyle walking for a bit. so we were running around for a bit, we got some drinks at gameworks, and decided to freestyle walk some more back in the direction of the paramount. so we ran into some guy who said he could get us tickets. i really don’t want to go over that whole jacking thing cause it basically happened because i was drunk and the idiot factor that goes along with it. i’m still pissed at myself for being so goddamn stupid. but yeah we decided then that we needed to take the 14 year olds to hooters so we went to the one on lake union and got some food and ogled the beautiful ladies in their very tight clothes, it was rad. steve and his friend were stammering and shit and could barley order their food. it was rad. the waitress came up and started pulling up her shirt to cover her cleavage and told them that she could do that everytime they talked to them so she wouldn’t embaress them. it was rad.

so adam dropped me and mikey off at home here and we sat around chilling for a bit, watched teh royal tenebaums and spent like 2 hours writing, that was rad.

moved into bellingham, pretty much everything now, just some clothes sticking around here now. hung around with john and joshi most of the night, that was rad, they went with me to see triple x, and got osme beer and shit and spent the night drinking, and making a great 7 layer dip, and watchign the waterboy, wudar. but yeah my starter pretty much got stripped when i tried to start it this morning, so one of john and joshi’s friend hotwired it for me, it was rad. he stuck a flathead screwdriver in one end of an extension cord and put the plug on the starter to bridge it and then put the screwdriver on the positive node. it was so rad. but yeah, good thing it didn’t happen in seattle or something, that probably would have sucked, now i don’t have to worry bout it cause i ain’t driving no more.

so yeah this weeked was really strange to me. io just didn’t give a dman abou tanything, nothing bothered me at all over the weekend, despite all the loss, and shit. i just felt kinda numb about it all i suppose. it was rad. damn, there’s alot of people i still wanted to see before i got incapacitated but i suppose those people will just have to be put on hold….oh well, i’m sure they won’t care much anyways…it would have been nice to hang around with spencer again though.

what does not kill me, can only make me strogner

well this is it, my last day at work. soon it will be back to the joys of school and other masochistic activites. so thios will be my last work blog. its been a good summer to say the least, and this is kinda the final straw here. i mean moving out of seattle was the beginning of the end, but this is pretty much the end-all right here. no more vacationing and drifiting along doing nothing but what i want to do. now its back to forcing myself to do things…

i really wish this summer wouldn’t end, because there’s still alot of goofing off i want to do. i guess i don’t think that 3 months off wasn’t enough to justify the amount of work i did last year, particularily spring quarter. i still have a bitter taste from that shit in my mouth, and i’m not looking forward to that again. at least i don’t have math, that is an absolute godsend. but i got organic chem, some ecology bio, and some physics. so i’m gonna die. yeah, i’d much rather goof off.

i kinda feel like this is gonna be my last summer off where i have a cush job and don’t do anything, but i’m guessing next year will probably be more of the same. but shit, that’s a whole year, i might be living in tanzania for all i know by this time next year…of course i still have this knee surgery jazz and like another week off, so i got time to sit around and do a samn good bit of nothing. but still, summer’s over, gotta deal with it…

this is summer ryan, signing out